AM I A VICTIM?
How
to decide?
We enter relationships with the expectation that they will be based on love, understanding, and mutual respect. However, sometimes we may find ourselves in a partnership that seems more complicated and destructive than we originally imagined. It is important to reflect on such a relationship and ask ourselves the question: Is my partner a narcissist? Is my partner a narcissist?
The term “narcissism” is increasingly used these days, but its meaning can be confusing and is not only related to self-love. A partner who displays some of the signs of narcissism can disrupt the mental balance of the other person with their behavior and attitudes, causing lasting consequences. Psychological abuse and mistreatment in such a relationship can have profound psychological consequences and affect the victim's quality of life.
If you are currently asking yourself these questions and considering whether you are in a relationship with a narcissist and whether you are suffering from psychological abuse, it is important not to be afraid to face the truth. Take a look at the telltale signs that describe narcissists, how narcissists behave in a relationship, and what are the symptoms of narcissistic abuse. By recognizing the signs of psychological abuse and the important steps you can take to protect yourself and decide where your relationship will go.
Is my partner a narcissist?
- Overconfidence: Narcissists have a very inflated opinion of themselves and consider themselves exceptional, successful, and special.
- Need for admiration: Narcissists crave constant admiration and praise, and seek attention and recognition from others.
- Lack of empathy: Narcissists are incapable of experiencing empathy and understanding the feelings and needs of other people.
- Manipulation: Narcissists manipulate others to achieve their goals, and can be very resourceful in gaining control over other people.
- Excessive criticism and arrogance: Narcissists are overly critical and contemptuous of others in order to elevate themselves and demean others.
- Narcissistic Stories: Part of their behavior is telling stories about their "perfection," achievements, and excellence.
- Envy and Competitiveness: Narcissists are very envious and feel threatened by the success and happiness of others.
- Exploitation of Others: Narcissists use other people to achieve their goals and treat people as tools or resources.
- Low Self-Esteem: Although they may present themselves as confident and strong, many narcissists have low self-esteem and seek validation and recognition from others to make themselves feel better.
- Inability to Accept Criticism: Narcissists are often prone to defensiveness and rejecting any suggestion that their opinion or what they have done is wrong.
Am I in a relationship with a narcissist?
- Idealization: At the beginning of the relationship, the narcissist idealizes the victim, giving them attention, compliments, and portraying them as a perfect and irresistible person.
- Devaluation: Gradually, the narcissist begins to devalue the victim, criticizes them, belittles their efforts and endeavors, and tries to lower their self-esteem.
- Dehonesty: The narcissist may use verbal attacks, slander, and insults to hurt and humiliate the victim.
- Manipulation: Using manipulation, lies, and tricks to achieve their goals and maintain control over the victim.
- Strong control: The narcissist will have a desire to have absolute control over the victim, make decisions for them, and limit their freedom.
- Making judgments without the ability to Defenses: The narcissist often judges and criticizes the victim, but rejects any comments or criticism from them.
- Emotional Dependency Abuse: The narcissist may exploit the victim's dependence on him or her and threaten to break up or abandon them in order to control them.
- Period of Calm: Devaluation may be followed by a short period of relative calm and relationship improvement to keep the victim in the cycle.
- Idealization: The narcissist may then resume the idealization phase, where they again give attention and compliments to regain control over the victim.
- Cycle Repetition: This cycle may repeat itself, with the devaluation and manipulation escalating and worsening.
Am I suffering the consequences of psychological abuse and torture?
- Low self-esteem: The person has low self-esteem and a sense of insecurity about themselves.
- Constant anxiety: The person may often be tense, fearing the consequences of their behavior and words, lest they anger the narcissist.
- Excessive responsibility: The person feels it is their duty to satisfy the narcissist's needs and expectations and meet their demands.
- Confusion and disorientation: The person is confused by the narcissist's constant mood swings and changes in behavior.
- Emotional exhaustion: The abuse can deplete the victim's emotional resources, leading to fatigue and exhaustion.
- Alienation from one's own feelings: The person loses touch with their own emotional needs and feelings because she is still focused on the narcissist's needs.
- Justifying the Narcissist: Feeling responsible for the narcissist's problems and seeking excuses for their behavior.
- Loss of Identity: Abuse can cause a person to lose their personal identity and begin to identify only with the narcissist's needs.
- Depression and Sadness: A person may feel depressed, sad, and empty from prolonged exposure to the abuse.
- Isolation and Loneliness: The abused person may experience feelings of isolation and loneliness because they are separated from the support of family and friends due to the narcissist's manipulations.
ACEs Score Test:
How Childhood Experiences Affect Your Life
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) are traumatic events that an individual experienced before the age of 18. These experiences may include physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, neglect, or other family dysfunction. Research shows that a higher number of such experiences may be associated with an increased risk of health and social problems in adulthood.
The ACEs test is used to assess the level of exposure to such experiences, which consists of 10 questions focused on different types of childhood trauma. Each positive answer increases the total score by one point. Higher scores indicate higher levels of exposure to childhood trauma and potentially higher risk of negative health outcomes.
🔗 Presentation of ACEs scores in Slovak:
